this is how we do it. --ronarons™

missing bruno =(

2009-11-12T15:49:00.001+08:00

Vanilla Twilight (Owl City)

The stars lean down to kiss you,
And I lie awake I miss you,
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.
Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly,
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'll send a postcard to you dear,
Cause I wish you were here.

I watch the night turn light blue,
But it's not the same without you,
Because it takes two to whisper quietly,
The silence isn't so bad,
Till I look at my hands and feel sad,
Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.

I'll find opposing new ways,
Though I haven't slept in two days,
Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone.
But drenched in Vanilla twilight,
I'll sit on the front porch all night,
Waist deep in thought because when I think of you.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.

As many times as I blink I'll think of you... tonight.
I'll think of you tonight.

When violet eyes get brighter,
And heavy wings grow lighter,
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.
And I'll forget the world that I knew,
But I swear I won't forget you,
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past,
I'd whisper in your ear,
Oh darling I wish you were here.

5 things

2009-11-04T22:04:00.004+08:00

1. mother superior's married. and it annoys me to death when she speaks of "her husband." and not refering jerry as, well, jerry. haha! but i'm so happy for her. it is our family's dream to see her walk down the aisle. that dream that we all prayed so hard for, including my friends, came to reality and its just magical. its a fairytale ending that i'd like to experience one of these days and mother superior's words to me was "its worth the wait."

2. im in a very very serious state of trying to lose weight. i have been jogging for the last few weeks. i sold my soul to gym membership two months back. and im not eating any junk food anymore. and rice, yes, that two cups of rice!!!! okay fine, i still do but i try to minimize. i'm trying to hit my target weight by march. please pray for my soul's safety. haha!

3. bruno is on a business trip to jakarta for a month. and i miss him everyday.

4. i lost all my phone contacts which was really dumb cuz i did a phone back up EXCEPT for the contacts before reformatting it. all photos and videos are safe--thank God--but my contacts are all gone. so guys, if you feel like keeping in touch, please email me your numbers. ronarons at yahoo dot com.

4. being carefree, direction-less and not caring about the world are taking its toll on me now. i am desperate of finding what i really want to do for the rest of my life. all the jobs i've taken up are mostly "temporary" to me, "until i find something interesting enough for me to stay for good." i'd always say. i was free and up for the experience and just do whatever i'd want to do. this time, its time to get serious. its time to do real business, not the monkey one. every job i've been through seems to be just a place for me to pass time and wait for the world to end without even accomplishing anything remarkable. i mean, yes, i know i've had the time of my life, too much of it actually--the circus, chaos, cheap thrill, excitement and everything random. now its time to plan my life and find its meaning.

5. its almost december and the wind's getting colder each day. its nice to feel the december breeze, it reminds me so much of home. i miss spending christmas at home. but singapore is home for now. i have three of my girls here, claire, karen and mapet and they're all i need to make me feel like i'm not very far from home.

there is nothing much to say here, really. as i'm getting old my life doesn't have enough action and funny stories to share. but life's good so far. its good surprisingly good. =)

take care everyone. be safe if you guys are in manila. you are all in my prayers.

naked and sacred by maria nyler

2009-10-21T18:06:00.001+08:00

what does love need
can love last
i ask myslef these questions
haunted by the past
i walk these city streets
i've known the vitories and defeat
searching hoping just barely coping
baby i wanna be good for you
i wanna be true
don't know how to live with myself
if i ever hurt you

this song reminds me of 2004....

congratulations to my mother

2009-10-16T13:27:00.001+08:00

finally!

2009-09-18T02:29:00.013+08:00

the new post interface is back! i don't know what happened to blogger for the last few weeks. weird.

okay. updates.

mother superior's wedding preparation is at its peak. it's unbelievable how i'm becoming like i have OCD. i am telling you, going through her guest list alone in excel sheet takes me 2 hours to "update." in the sheet, there's 5 columns: guests, reserved seats, invitation sent: yes or no, responded: yes or no, table # and accomodation.

example:

Rona Lipke 1 YES YES Table 3 House 1

and there's 130+ of them to figure out. this is driving me crazy. i find this the easiest way to do because its microsoft excel for crying out loud! and excel sheets can do the math for me. and i see this as one whole math project so yea its quite a challenge but going over it again and again makes my life a bit easier.

bruno is back from his business trip! indefinitely! haha! he arrived last tuesday morning. and i feel so bad for having this very very bad habit of being late when fetching someone from the airport. yes, you guessed it right, it always end up that the arrivee (haha is there such a term?) waits for the fetchee (?) and not in the other way around. hahaha! but i'm glad i didn't keep bruno waiting for me for so long. oh god, i'm so happy to see him! such a handsome tattooed eye-candy! haha! he was supposed to fly off to jakarta this week but things are put on hold in his project so he's staying in singapore for now.

karen's off to bangkok. two weeks ago she was in bali. the woman can't stay put!!! but this bangkok trip is for a dragon boat competition. my beautiful boys oue and jc are there to support karen (i am not very convinced with my own statement!). i hope karen does well there and i hope she comes home safely. and as for the two boys, i just hope they come home in one piece! goodluck ladies!!!! enjoy bangkok and keep on sawadeekap-ing!!!! hahahaha!!!

what else? what else?

oh ya. my team china of three women is stronger now. one can say 'fuck' to our senior, which is good, at least no one would her. the other one is now learning to answer me and my manager back. one day she's going to file a restraining order or harrassment case against me. she keeps on saying "anduh" for the word "and." i told her "one more anduh and i will slap your face." i don't think i'm in my sane mind right now. well, not on any moment i guess. oh good lord. but i like these girls. hardworking, fast and eager. no politics, no issues, no special requests (haha, i know i should be guilty of all of the above!) 3 months and they will learn to speak english in no time, maybe they can speak black american too. wassap ya'll!!! hahahahaha!!!! they're improving ya. especially with my colleague "lalat" (malay world of langaw) teaches them very important things in life and asking the girls: "are you still a virgin? you know virgin? oh you don't know virgin" and if she gets a no, she draws things. you know, things. hahahah!!! god, my workplace is such one big comedy circus! but seriously man, they're improving pretty fast! and its not as frustrating as it was before (especially when i heard one say "kyu mi" which means "excuse me!")

okay, time to sleep. thanks for the time everyone. as usual. sometimes you know i hope i touch people's lives through my entries but when i go through them one more time, i'd be like. who on earth would waste their time reading my stupid and nonsense rants? but then, who knows.

shocks! enough already! goodnight everyone! kiss kiss! =)

HALT.

2009-09-09T01:34:00.002+08:00

i won't be publishing entries for the next few weeks because i will be very very busy.

1. the brother's coming over to singapore to watch the f1 race.
2. bruno's few days stay before he leaves again for jakarta for two weeks.
3. mother superior's last minute wedding preparations.
4. my team china training. we have three newhires from china that need intense english training so yeah, don't ask.
5. my life-changing decision.

this blog's becoming so robotic anyway. listing 5 things with no story telling, no swear words, no major drama is no good. i guess its time to put my blog to rest. after five long years of abuse from the writer, i will give it a month's worth of days off.

i will be back. with vengeance. haha!

take care everyone! kiss kiss! =D

5 things i learned about 5 years of blogging

2009-09-06T01:24:00.005+08:00

1. posting photos of people from work is eventually gonna get you in trouble.
2. posting names of people from work will get you in trouble.
3. posting events will get you in trouble with people you didn't invite to that event.
4. posting events will get you in trouble with your family.
5. posting events will get into other people's gossip headlines.

and last but not the least, this blog thing just keeps me both sane and insane... but mostly insane!

my first post:

Monday, September 06, 2004

test

test blog....
hehehehe... funny....

XOXO Ronarons™ at 1:20:00 PM 0
cuddles

HAPPY 5TH BIRTHDAY RONARONS DOT BLOGSPOT DOT COM!
its been 5 years and you're doing just fine! =) cheers to good, beautiful, funny, interesting, amazing, crazy life! =)

cinderella on ice

2009-09-05T23:26:00.000+08:00

i just watched cinderella on ice (by imperial ice stars) at esplanade theatre with 9 beautiful little girls in princesses costumes. i am telling you, watching over 9 kids was not easy even though i had 3 more adults with me. each one of them had their own concerns in life: "i'm hungry." "where's mommy?" "who is that?" "i wanna pee pee." "i wanna sit beside someone else." "i'm sleepy." "i'm bored." "i'm thirsty." "what's your name?" "is it finished?" and the questions went on forever.

i could tell all eyes were on us. we were the only bunch whose kids were in princess costumes. it was a riot. and it was sooooooo much fun. and i was very touched when one girl in sleeping beauty outfit fell asleep in my arms. i can actually do it! i can actually hold a child! hahaha!

the show has another life by itself. it was beautiful. amazing. spectacular. the dance, the acts, the moves, the music, the costumes, the lights, everything was beautiful!

and we met olga, the ice skater who played cinderella! she's only 24 years old, a very talented young woman! and she's the sweetest! it didn't feel like i was meeting a human ice skater, it felt like we were actually meeting a disney cartoon character (in ice skates!) she's very soft-spoken, sweet, graceful, regal and very princess-like. i loved her in an instant. i was this close to hugging her and having my own picturial with her but i actually got hold of myself , acted cool and like an adult and tried my best to keep my composure as long as i could! haha! (deep inside, the child in me was jumping with joy!)

i'd have to say this is one of the best days of my life. i had so much fun and i'm very amazed how strangers can work out with each other just by e-mail and that they can make a child's wish come true. i am very very thankful to those who helped and gave their support for my wish child. it was truly magical for me and my little girl.

i will be posting photos privately, soon. =)

God bless Make A Wish Foundation Singapore!

gah

2009-08-28T02:57:00.000+08:00

so i finally removed my 101 things to do in 1,001 days.

after a year of putting it up there, it made no sense at all. so i finally took it down because its stupid. i didn't even bother copying it to a notepad and at least keep it for future reference. what a waste of time.

one day at a time, my Lord.

tomorrow's a good day, i pray.

5 things i want to do but i couldn''t

2009-08-28T02:48:00.001+08:00

1. scream at someone who is very dumb and to the people who don't deserve my respect.
2. throw things within my reach to people i hate.
3. eat in the stupid bus.
4. jaywalk. i just wanna fucking jaywalk and not wait for green lights and walk over that stupid zebra paint on the streets.
5. smoke just about anywhere!

the last two days have been very bad. i hope tomorrow's a better day.

goodnight everyone! =)

i hate it when everything's in order, too proper, too law-abiding attitude. i hate it. maybe because my life's been a good chaos and i miss it.

at 4am i should be sleeping. but, no. at 4am, i have random thoughts. and yes, its 5 of them.

2009-08-22T04:08:00.003+08:00

bored at 2am, i randomly browsed through my facebook friends. i rarely do this because i hate seeing successful and failing people. bitterness, envy and joy all in one is not good. it is a perfect recipe for my undying question: what am i doing with my life? comparison definitely won't help in any way. soooo, this randomness brought me to my university friend's page. richard. and he's married. happily married. back in the early days of university i was very close with only three people who i was majoring with: tessa, anj, dina and richard. oh wait, dina was economics and anj was philosophy. it was heaven's plan to gather us in one block. so yes, there were 4 of us trying to figure out and fight our way through college with alcohol and ecstasy. haha! just kidding! that was 2000. shortcut to 2009. dina, tessa, anj and richard are all married. what do i say now? i am the last 'single' standing. matira matibay. the great old maid. oh god, no! i am not rushing to get married. i'm just so envious of the beautiful photos people's weddings. fine, i am defeated by my own defense (and pretense). "i will never get married." now that i'm 27, i seriously do not want to die alone. i'd like to have one husband, please. take away. and i want it him warm. but good lord, a husband is not a chinese takeaway. i cannot just tell the man i'm dating, "oh hi, good evening. nice suit. thanks for the dinner. would you like to marry me?" i am not in the marrying stage but i can tell already that it is not as easy as ordering mcdelivery.

but Lord, i am praying. i do not want to end up ordering mcdelivery alone. at 50 years old!

and angeli, you have got to stop calling me old maid!

maybe i'd adopt an african child.

oh, sorry. that's not funny.

have u seen bruno? no, not my bruno. the borat movie bruno. its so much fun and, um, annoying at the same time. it tried too hard its not funny anymore.

4:15 am. what is wrong with me????

mother superior's wedding. or should i say my wedding. the manager of the venue must've gone crazy already. i emailed her a complete jpg and powerpoint presentation of how i want the ceremony and reception seating/table arrangement to be. details of how the service staff should serve drinks and food are now on a 3-page single spaced font 10 word document. and there are 38 "things to do." i am very sure by now my own mother is regretting handing all these into my hands. i told her i might not have a decent wedding so i might as well put so much effort in this like its mine. and yes, a wedding dress for myself won't hurt.

another thing is mama mors. my nanny of more than 10 years. mother superior and her sibling's nanny. all of my cousin's nanny. she is coming home for the wedding. she is the mother of all mothers. she's the one everyone's waiting to come home. i haven't seen her for the last 4 or 5 years because she's very busy spending her husband's money in some casino in australia. everyone in the family has already accepted, mama mors has only one favorite: and that's my 20 year old cousin benson. no one touches benson, otherwise you will have to face mama mors' dramatic tears. "wag na wag nyong anuhin si benson!" were her last words before she left for her married life. (what on earth is "anuhin" mama mors?) and she made sure her favoritism of benson is sent across the entire family clan clearly. anyway, she was officially an old maid because of us, her alagas. was. and due to last minute change of mind, she got married. i see myself in mama mors already. oh god. not again. i'm so excited to see her. everyone will have to find ways to sleep beside her. this time i will find my way to mama mors' bedside, even if it takes me to "ano" benson! hahahaha!!!! haaaay mama mors, i love you soooo much!

i was gonna say something about our newhired waitresses from china. i was training the other one to do food running. and it was a disaster in its highest form. i want to kill myself.

my novena for this week: patience. Lord, grant me the patience.

i guess i was sleeping when the Lord showered patience upon the universe.

okay, 4:31 says the clock. time to sleep now.

goodnight boys and girls. and always remember to thank the Lord for your life, good or bad, you are still alive and breathing and enjoying His creations on earth, yes, including that little mosquito that bit you last night.

and one last thing, whoever hurts my brother one more time will have to endure my trash talking. trust me on that.

LASTLY, i have no respect to people who go to church and do not practice what they preach. i am not perfect and some days i am one of them and i do hate and disrespect myself for that. but these very active church people are sickening. disgusting. and an embarrassment to human kind. just please stop.

that's all.

i am enough.....

2009-08-17T01:56:00.000+08:00

enough of all these plane crashes
enough of cory aquino's death
enough of GMA's 20 thousand dollar dinner at le cirque
enough of katrina 'tbe drug addict slut' halili (i know this is old news but can i just say this. hayden, if you're reading this, i feel you doc. i am on your side. hang tough my friend! keep your handsome face up high, ok?)
enough with blogging
enough with the drama

for the last few days i have been writing. yes, hand writing to myself. and it feels good. i don't need to be funny to please readers who email me and read my blog cuz they find me funny. i don't need to check my grammar (although i normally don't) and i don't need to censor my words. i can write the words shit, bitch, sex, love and a few names as well. most of all, i don't need to look and sound successful and good mannered (to please my good old aunties and relatives who read this blog).

enough with the hypcrites. the politicians and church.
enough with stealing, killing and suicide bombings.
enough with this material world
enough with madonna's 80's videos on youtube.com and perezhilton.com
enough with sugary words
and most of all enough with self-absorption.

i try my best to be selfless. to be patient. and be kind at its highest form.
to let go, to understand and to care.

one last question. when do you use 'enough of' and 'enough with'? LOL!!!!

i'm sure GOd thinks i must be crazy.

its so nice to see new things at home today

2009-08-08T02:09:00.003+08:00

a new book from philnee.

to rona,
thank you for the love, acceptance and never-ending support. cheers to a wonderful friendship and more...
i love you,
phil
07 aug 2009

THANK YOU VERY MUCH PHIL!!!! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!!!!!! =)

and my pink quilt cover. i changed sheets today! it is so nice to finally get over andrew's pink fitted sheet and pillowcases, his gift during our 2007 secret santa exchange gifts! haha!

that's my bed on the left. on the right is karen's. yes, our beds are all pink. wait until claire comes back, our house is going to be one little kindergarten for girls. mapet, on the other hand, is a kill joy when it comes to pink madness.

its 2:22 am. time to make a wish.

and its time to sleep as well.

goodnight everyone!

WHAT IS WRONG WITH BLOGGER???

2009-08-03T02:52:00.000+08:00

i'm in rich text format and i couldn't upload photos and videos. i couldn't find the stupid buttons. i'm too lazy to do HTML here.

anyway.

i didn't know tita cory's health was fast deteriorating because of cancer. today she's on the front page of sinapore's national newspaper. and from all the news i've read online i'd have to say she is, no doubt, the most well-loved president of the philippines. i have been watching youtube videos, yes, including that kris' live interview by the buzz at greenhills. and my tears are falling nonstop. she's so religious that the last words she heard were from her family's prayers who were on her deathbed. she's so religious she had filipinos pray for each other. and she's so religious she did a bloodless people power revolution. and this healing prayer touched me so much that i cried like cory aquino was my mother.

i've already said my beautiful prayers for the beautiful woman who was the first female president of the philippines. i hope you're hanging out with ninoy now, tita. have a good rest up there.

5 random thoughts

2009-07-27T01:15:00.002+08:00

blessed, lucky, and proper guidance. that's what i'm feeling right now. i do not feel that i am above anyone in this world but i am very very grateful i am not finding shelter in the streets and begging for food. i am very very grateful i do not have life-threatening sickness that my parents have to sell everything we have to foot hospital bills. i am very very grateful i went to school and learned how to read and write. i am very very grateful to have been born in a democratic country where freedom is practised day and night. i am very very grateful i have good friends and that i haven't got involved in any bad company where drugs, sex and stealing are a norm. most of the days i am very very thankful for another morning waking up and knowing everyone i know is still alive. all in all, and amidst the heartbreak from time to time, i basically live a happy, good and easy life. but sometimes i feel that i am living a mediocre life. there are days i don't feel grateful at all and there's nothing else to do but whine and complain of this mediocrity. yes, there are fabulous days, of course, but i still feel the need of doing more. right now, i am not complaining. i am just grateful to God, that's all there is to this thought. i hope you are too.

i want to be a housewife. for some reason i do not know, i was very very tired today at work. maybe i'm pms-ing or maybe its the lack of sleep. yeah, today wasn't the greatest. anyway. imagine this: a table of 10 women and beside each one of them is a pram/stroller and a 4 month old baby. 5 of the 10 have maids at home for sure and won't have to change diapers every few hours. maybe 4 out of 10 have very powerful high-ranking husbands and they don't need to cook dinner for him because they have formal dinner invites to attend to almost everyday. these 10 women hang out for coffe or tea and some light snacks at some cute little chic cafe at 2 in the afternoon. they finish their session at 6pm. they go home, do some gardening, take a shower, put their babies to bed, watch a little tv, eat salad, brush their teeth and have sex with their husbands. in the morning while their child is asleep or in school, they go to the country club and play some sport, tennis, golf, mahjong, or whatever. then they have lunch out with their babies and a few friends they know from this or that women's association. come 2 in the afternoon the cycle repeats again: coffee, tea, light snacks pram. and their lives go on like that. how wonderful. how simple. so yes, today i want to be a housewife and live a life like that. i do not want to do any work, no deadlines, no customers, no boss. like i said in thought #1, there is no complaining, its just a thought and i'm just tired today. (and besides, i don't think i'm ever going to to marry at all, or who knows. i'm just waiting for that man who will have the guts and strength and the ability to ask my hand for marriage. but of course i won't say yes to every man who comes my way, i will also have to see if he deserves my out of this world tantrums and demands. hahaha!)

4 planes. 2 months. i believe in God and i believe in signs too. i do not live my day to day life dictated by signs but i take the recent plane tragedies as a precaution. i am not saying that God is telling us to repent because the end is near and that he's giving us a sign by bringing all the planes down. no. the God i know is not like that. the sign that i'm seeing here is this: you can die anytime at any place. you don't know when your last day on earth is going to be. so this is a sign. this is a sign to live my life to the fullest, every damn day, like it is your last. i am 100% sure that those 500+ victims of all 4 crashes did not have the slightest idea that they're going to die. and when they knew they were going to die, i wonder what their thoughts were about. how about you, let's say you just found out now that you're going to die in 30 minutes? what are you going to think about?

enough! why am i very serious today? haha! i have to stop reading coehlo's books.

i'm going to miss him. bruno is moving to another country in less than two weeks. he's been chosen by his boss to run this newly opened establishment somewhere. it saddens me because its very difficult for the one who stays but at the same time i am very excited and happy for him. he's an achiever and i know this is just one of the stones he's going to step for him to rule the world. or the world's kitchen! haha! but if i am being the rona one year ago, i'd be begging for him to stay. but no, i want him to go out there and see the world. we don't know how things are going to be, its too soon to say. i just know i'm going to miss him terribly.

my last thought is not random. i have been meaning to write about this for a week now.

when was the last time you brought food to your loved one to his/her workplace? our salad chef, J, was surprised by his girlfriend. (and i saw it and made a big hoo ha out of it!) a lady went into the shop, walked towards the salad bar and handed J a paperbag. i saw J's reaction, i could tell he wasn't expecting any package of some sort and without a word the lady left. later on J went to the back kitchen and opened the paperbag (all along i have been following the series of events because it just struck me, how the lady executed her love for J. is it obvious that i'm envious? well, yes i am.) J took out a few microwavable plastic boxes from the paperbag. and in it was food. it was J's dinner. his girlfriend made him dinner and brought it to work. i died of envy. i can never do that. i can never bring my boyfriend dinner. at work. no. apart from the fact that i have no capability of cooking decent food, i also do not have the energy to go to my man's office just to bring him dinner. all the more the man works at a restaurant where he can just cook for himself whatever he wants. you know what i mean? well, that, ladies and gentlemen, was love. (in my own terms) an effort like that is under the category of love. and now i remember, i actually did that. i actually did bring my ex boyfriend some food to his house. i didn't cook it, it was mcdonalds, but it was the effort that mattered. my ex loved me for having the patience to go to mcdonalds divisoria at 12 noon and queue for food. now let me ask you, when was the last time you brought him food?

riding in cars with boys

2009-07-25T01:17:00.003+08:00

surprisingly i went home early today. early is 10pm. i normally get home at the same time cinderella leaves her glass slippers: 12 midnight.

because i got home at 10 and mapet, who provides me round the clock nonsense entertainment, is not home, i decided to watch a movie of my favorite actress drew barrymore: riding in cars with boys. i'd have to say its always a feel good movie even if it always, always brings me to tears at the end. when my daughter turns 15, i will enforce that she watch the movie for her not be called "a tramp" by his father. hahaha!

anyway.

tomorrow's a big day for me. i am meeting my second wish child. she's a 3 year old girl suffering from acute lymphoblastic leukemia. i am meeting her to know her wish and possibly grant it real soon. hopefully, God-willing. her information says she loves princesses and angelina ballerina. maybe i can start from there. maybe i can ask her if she wants to be a princess or prima ballerina for a day. i hope i can talk properly tomorrow. things like these weaken me. innocent children with life-threatening sickness weakens me. i am very keen to be a part of make a wish foundation but i am not good at facing people with real life problems, critical health-related problems. and yes, especially children to be very specific. it has always been a challenge to me. when we were in high school, the convent brought us to the orphanage and to the mental hospital to "know the real world", i cried like i was related to the orphans and the mentals by blood. oh god, please help me tomorrow. i hope i won't cry infront of my wish child and her parents. and i know i'm terrible with kids. i pray i'll be fine tomorrow.

speaking of kids: tiffany, a very good friend who is a mother of one, is going to be a mother of two next month!!!!! i hope gabe gets a little sister. and i hope the girls and i are all godparents again.

oh no! i'm always a godparent. its either that or bridesmaid and maid of honor.

i have things to say. not so important but it could be a good topic for discussion. hmmmm... where do i start?

this month alone i've read three books already. and that's a good sign. during the laziest time of my life, like the last 4 years of my life, i read one book every two months. this month i'm in my reading mode. three books in one month. one from khaled hosseini and two from paulo coelho. i am not a huge coelho fan but the books the alchemist and the zahir amaze me and leave me to thinking: what is my ultimate purpose in life? am i following the universe signs in order to obtain my Personal Legend? and my never ending quest of finding that one true unconditional love. the other book, a thousand splendid suns, is a book of ultimate love and freedom gained through death. it brought me to tears, for days! (as of press time and after googling the latter book, i found out that they're making it into a film. this excites me even though i know movies based on books always disappoint me. i'm still going to watch it. and i can't wait. another book turned movie is time traveller's wife which i'm going to read again--thanks bonani for the book-- as i've read it a long time ago and i forgot the details already. i've seen the trailer, rachel mcadams and eric bana, and its beautiful! )

if eat pray love turns into a movie, i will probably die.

and after googling, AGAIN, they're actually in production already and will release the movie in 2011 and will be starred by julia roberts as elizabeth gilbert. OH MY GOD!!!!!! 2011 is the year!!!!! 2 years and i can't wait already! haha! and guess what, one of the producers is brad pitt.

i wonder when are they filimg at ketut liyer's house in bali. i want to gooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!

now i'm lost. i'm supposed to write something interesting but this news is too overwhelming!

god bless google.

that's all i need to say right now. goodnight everyone.

hmmmmm

2009-07-13T23:37:00.003+08:00

i clicked 'new post' without a purpose. i have nothing to say. i have been to the philippines--manila, cdo, camiguin--and back and yet i don't feel like sharing anything here. it feels impersonal.

this blog is on its 5th year. more or less 60 months of nonsense drama. i don't know if this has a purpose. i know it used to have a purpose, to update my family and friends back home. and along the way i thought i'd carry on with this blog because i want my future children to read this and know their mother in her heydays. that part i know this blog has served its purpose.

everything else is a blur.

oh, the drama.

i need sleep. now.

very very sad

2009-07-01T18:37:00.003+08:00

more than 300 people died from plane crash: air france and yemenia airlines, all within a month. i have nothing else to say, its extremely heartbreaking. i fear for everyone's lives every day now. i mean you can never tell which plane will dive into the ocean tomorrow. i can go on and on about this but there is nothing else i can do.

there's nothing else to do but pray.

pray for the souls, for the family, friends, airline owners and the airbus makers.

most of all, i am praying that the one survivor of yemenia airlines. she will never ever live a normal life now. she will live in fear and trauma for the rest of her life. i pray for the girl's guidance and her (emotional) recovery. and i hope she lives her second life the best way she can.

how sad!

2009-06-27T02:29:00.004+08:00

i woke up to karen's morning rituals. i don't normally notice her leaving the room but this morning, i was just wide awake and didn't feel a single hint of sleepiness. my eyes were shut close as karen softly shut the door behind her.

with one eye opened, i went to facebook mobile. i would have to say facebook status is the new CNN.

michael jackson died of cardiac arrest!

i hurriedly went to perezhilton's site and there it was confirmed: the king of pop is gone.

its not as sad as the kids starving to death fighting for life in africa. but the death of the icon is extremely sad in a different way. he's legendary. he can sing and dance. yes, he may have touched kids, only God knows, but his talent is was extraordinary. let us all look at the positive side of the man. i'm sure he changed people's lives in some ways. his fans. his family. his children.

it is just too sad. like i have prayed for all the deaths i've read and heard, let's say a little prayer for michael jackson.

you've done your part in this world. now go and rest peacefully mr. jackson. you did a great job and its time to rest. thank you very much for the good music you've shared.

i just want this, nothing else.

2009-06-19T23:33:00.001+08:00

what is your theme song?

2009-06-17T01:53:00.004+08:00

i was browsing my mp3 directory to look for mother superior's wedding march: runaway by the corrs. its a beautiful instrumental version with just violin and piano. i was hoping to send it to the violinist who's playing on mother superior's wedding. until now i still can't find it. i have the corrs version on my phone which i'm going to delete soon cuz everytime it plays, it brings me to tears. i swear, my trip home everyday from work is a soap opera entitled, 'who cries the most in bus 36?', hands down i'd be the grandslam best actress.

oh god, i'm not even sure if mother superior would want that as her wedding march. i don't know if jerry likes that song as well. i just know its mother superior's favorite song though. i know she sings it almost everyday in her magic sing. and i know she can play it with the guitar (not sure about piano though). but yeah, i will insist. she will walk down the aisle with runaway as her wedding song.

anyway.

speaking of songs. while i was browsing my mp3 directory, i've seen old, old, old songs that i have dedicated to my former flames. oh god, how embarrassing. my 'songs of the ex' are extremely cheesy. but who cares? i'd have to say the songs are swak na swak. what's the english of swak na swak? perfectly matchd? i don't know. and who cares? haha! hmmm, let me recall....

1. 1,000 things by jason mraz for my first love, he played this song while we were driving up to tagaytay to spend the weekend together.

And I've, well I've seen a thousand things in one place
But I stopped my counting when I saw your face
Erasing memory, well I feel as though I've never seen a face before
Until I saw your eyes
And they're smiling back at me through my tears
I've been counting all these years, oh
Suddenly the thousand things I've seen were nothing more than dreams of
Of you and me
You and me
Quietly at a standstill now
Fortunately you will, well you'll kiss me, I will
I will kiss you back

2. angel of mine by monica, i'd sing this to angelo every karaoke and i'd sing "angelo of mine" in the chorus.

Nothing means more to me then what we share
No one in this world can ever compare
Last night the way you moved is still on my mind
Angel of Mine

What you mean to me you'll never know
Deep inside I need to show

3. i'm yours by jason mraz, my song for A cuz i was excitedly all his but he was never mine.

So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

4. indestructible by alisha's attic, cuz i thought bom and i were indestructible, but i was blinded, completely deluded and wrong.

Hey, hey, you can be wicked
And you know I can be fickle sometimes too, y'know
Maybe you're my better side
(better side)
Or maybe you annoy me to the point of where I'm holding this
(gun against your head, but I never said we have the same free spirit,
tell me will you cry? Don't cry)
So give me a sign

Coz we are Indestructible
Yeah we are
And you are my life-line
And we are Indestructible
Yes we are, mmm

hahahaha! oh my god! this is embarrassing! i am such a loser! after all these theme songs, all these bloody motherfuckers left anyhow. no more theme song this time. right at the very moment my only song for all of them should be the one by the corrs:

I never really loved you anyway
No I didnt love you anyway
I never really loved you anyway
Im so glad youre moving away

hahahahah!!! shocks! it 3 am! i am soooo amazed of how i can entertain myself at this very hour, even if it takes to embarrass myself in this blog!

how about you? what are your theme songs? don't be shy. tell me, even if it includes "i remember the boy but i don't remember the feeling anymore..." hahahahah!!!! oh god i need to sleep!!!

last.

guys do me a favor. if there's a good song you really really like, please don't dedicate it to your current flame. because if it fails, the song will be tainted and you will hate yourself for life. trust me on that. LOL! =D

to the philippine embassy in singapore

2009-06-15T10:17:00.003+08:00

i called the philippine embassy this morning to check on visas.

after being put on hold for 15 minutes and transfered twice, i finally got hold of a "visa officer."

me: hi, good morning po. sa visa department po to?
vo: yes.
me: tanong ko lang po kung kelangan ba ng visa ng indian national pag pupunta ng pilipinas.
vo: yes.
me: ano pong requirements?
vo (in a very pissed off tone): punta kayo sa website. andun lahat.
me (thoughts): eh bobo ka pala e. tatawag ba ako kung nasa harap ako ng computer ngayon? sa tingin mo may pasensha ako para kausapin ka at tumawag sa landline?

wossaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.....

me: ah... hmm.. ganon po ba?
vo: oo nasa website lahat ng kelangang impormasyon. anong gagawin nyo sa pinas?
me: magbabakasyon po.
vo: nasa website lahat.
me: kasi po, mobile ako ngayon. wala ako sa harap ng computer. at kelangan ko sana ang details ngayon kasi urgent po.
vo (a very heavy sigh like i was meant to hear it): 6 months bank statement. passport. personal appearance. anong status dito sa singapore?
me: permanent resident po.
vo: chaka copya ng pr nya.
me: magkano po yung visa?
vo: 110 dollars.
me: oh sige po. salamat po. bye-bye.

then she slammed the phone down. i didn't even hear the bitch (who doesn't deserve my "po") say goodbye or welcome. she just hung up like an uncivilised woman who didn't have GMRC in her mababang paaralan!!!!!

what ever happened to the "exceptional customer service" filipinos are well-known of?

to the philippine embassy in singapore, i guess you should hire younger people to answer your phones. you know those kids who didn't finish college and went to work in call centers straight away? yes, those kids. you should hire them. they may be the younger hard-headed generation but they have manners (at least on the phone) and not like your old unpleasant aunties in your office who just happened to pass the civil service exam. sorry but i have very high hopes of filipinos. i am proud to be a filipino. i'm just hoping the customer service is not as rotten as the philippine embassy building itself.

kthanksbye.

5 gifts

2009-06-11T18:43:00.005+08:00

i surprisingly didn't write any birthday wish list this year. but i'm very happy with all the wonderful birthday gifts i got from my friends.

1. billabong wallet from mapet. in my lifetime have never bought myself a wallet. and i don't know why, i just don't buy myself wallets. its either its a gift or a hand me down from mother superior. few years ago, claire bought me a nice pink roxy wallet which lasted 2 years. then mother superior gave me a more 'professional' looking long black wallet which lasted, well, 3 years. then now i have a nice long brown billabong one from mapet (which i chose myself by the way and handed it over to mapet so she can give it to me with a happy birthday greeting!) thanks pet!

2. coach wristlet from karen. i have been eyeing on karen's wristlets. she has a few coach wristlets that i always borrow cuz i don't dare buy cuz coach here in singapore is extremely overpriced. haha. sorry to say but yeah, its quite expensive here. and i will not spend 15,000 pesos for wristlet. karen lends me her stuff except for her prized possession: her lv bag. cannot touch. very expensive. especially with my heave and careless hands. that bag will be badly damaged once i use it. haha. kar, thanks for the wristlet. you don't know how much i love it!

3. my birthday cake from krysse and mimi. =) the beautiful birthday cake with 2 big candles and 7 small ones. 27. that's what it meant. and oh yes, the birthday song from the 7,107 staff. i looooveee birthday cakes. i like the traditional photo op of me and my friends with the cake, making a wish, blowing the cake and slicing of the cake. and yes, in that order. for me a birthday is not a birthday without a birthday cake and candles being blown. thank you ladies =)

4. calvin klein euphoria. euphoria n. A feeling of great happiness or well-being. [New Latin, from Greek, from euphoros , healthy : eu- , eu- + pherein , to bear.] euphoric. enough said.

5. diamond earrings. beautiful. thank you bruno. =)

but you know what, its not all about the material things i get in life. at the end of the day, its always the effort and thought that count. and above all things, it is all about relationships and people who remembered my special day, people who took 5 seconds of their time to message me and wish me a happy birthday.

i am just thankful i have a wonderful, meaningful, peaceful and blessed relationship with my friends.

si oue. bow.

2009-06-09T01:33:00.004+08:00

i can let go of every man i have ever been, but i can never let go of oue... like i said before, until i find a man i want to marry, oue is everything to me. hahaha!

so, bruno was there during my birthday eve dinner. just as i was telling him that the restaurant we were at is a good filipino semi fine dining restaurant he already started teasing me about filipino food. he claims that all filipino dishes have friend egg on top. he came to this conclusion because i made him try filipino food. and of all places, i brought him to jologs, a small tapsilogan in lucky plaza. and surprise surprise, he ordered tapsilog (and i had my usual lechon kawali and sisilog, o diba how babsy! haha!) so now, his idea of filipino food is rice, some fried shit and friend egg on top. (but of course as a chef he knows more than that, he was just teasing and i was a bit nervous cuz i know i have overacting friends.) then krysse defended that not all filipino food have fried eggs. then bruno simply said its just like how people in general think that all indian food is curry when in fact curry is everywhere. to cool things down, i said, "in the philippines we also have chicken curry....."

then my beloved, amazing, miss universe oue said, "oh yes! like in america, they also have mariah carey!"

oh good lord! i don't know if i should be thankful or embarrassed when he threw that remark. haha!

my birthday finale

2009-06-09T01:28:00.001+08:00

this photo doesn't need any caption. bow.